Wearing wigs is a personal journey that varies from person to person. While some people are extremely confident in their wigs, some people are just starting out and aren't ready to talk openly about their wigs just yet.
Is it rude to ask if someone is wearing a wig?
It's never polite to put someone on the spot about a potentially sensitive topic, so as a general rule... you shouldn't ask someone if they are wearing a wig. Let them talk about it to you... if they want to! Here's what happened when my aunt was approached about her wig in public last summer.
One day in Atlanta, I was walking with my aunt who had recently gone through a pretty lengthy and difficult battle with cancer. It was a sweltering hot day, and she had elected to wear a wig instead of her usual hat. At this point, my aunt had not had very much experience with wigs. The only one she had was off-brand and looked a bit, for lack of a better word, 'wiggy'.
We were in a fairly affluent area of town when we stopped into a little cafe for a light lunch before we continued our shopping adventures. By the time we sat down, my aunt had tried several different ways to adjust her wig that was making her hot. After the waiter took our drink orders, my aunt excused herself to go to the restroom to fix the wig in private and get herself readjusted.
The moment she was out of earshot, an older woman sat at the table adjacent to us, leaned over to me and asked if my aunt was wearing a wig. Before I could respond, my aunt had returned and was visibly upset.
She had heard what this woman said. And with one quick flick of the wrist, my aunt indignantly removed her wig to reveal her patchy scalp. Though her hair was growing back and at this point looked like a buzz cut, she still had many patches where no hair was growing at all. She stared down the intrusive woman, but the woman... who was left speechless. My aunt confidently sat back down, put her wig back on, and we enjoyed our meal in peace.
While I was furious that the woman had the audacity to ask her question in such a rude way, I realized that with cultural norms changing, it can be confusing whether or not to ask if someone is wearing a wig.
There is no reason to ever ask a stranger a personal question like the one my aunt was asked. Among friends and family is slightly different.. but you still need to make sure you ask these touchy questions in a delicate way while still showing support. Though my aunt did and does wear a wig, the bigger aspect of why she wears a wig is to help boost her self esteem. Before she had cancer, she had long, thick, beautiful locks of strawberry blonde hair and that was all taken away when she was given cancer treatments. Though she was relieved when her cancer went into remission, it was incredibly difficult for her to cope with the fact that her hair was growing back incredibly slowly and that it was growing in all patchy.
We shouldn’t sit and judge other people’s decisions about their looks without understanding why they do what they do. For women, hair can be an incredibly important facet of how they see their beauty. When that is stripped away because of something out of their control, it can be very difficult to move forward. However, wearing a wig, getting hair transplants, and using other hair-growth treatments can be positive not only for your overall visual package... it can drastically improve your mood and how you interact with the world! I saw this firsthand with my aunt and there is nothing like it. Being happy and confident in who you are is something we should all strive for.
How would you respond if someone asked if you were wearing a wig?
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